Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Overwhelmed and out of it!

This is the stuff...
That makes me feel like a crazy person!
I cannot seems to stay focused on any one task! I have 100 things running through my head, 100 jobs that need done today, a crazy dog that insists on whining to go out every 20 minutes only to stand on the porch and stare at me as if I'm the crazy one, and a 3 month old that has developed a need to be held and/or talked to constantly or she goes into " The Screamer" mode.
I have started the dishes...twice. There are still pans, etc "soaking". I have done 2 loads of laundry, neither have gotten folded or put away. I attempted to separate the girls' gifts with the intention of getting them wrapped. That hasn't happened yet. I'm also in my " find a fix" panic mode and have been googling(apparently not a real word) everything from homeschooling, make money online, to finding foreclosed homes in your area. My brain is seriously going to shut down soon. I am so mentally and physically exhausted! I still have faith that God has some plan for our family, I'm just not sure what I'm supposed to be doing at this point!?!?!? I am so confused on how to not be irresponsible as a parent and an adult while also letting God have all control! Any suggestions? How can I be proactive or plan without feeling like I will just make another huge mistake?
 Where do I stop trying, looking, eventually panicking from lack of answers?
Patience is a virtue?
Apparently one I have lost after being married to Sean for so many years.
I need sleep. I need prayers. I need a plan. I need answers before I lose my mind!

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Episode: The Screamer

Birdie has become our "Screamer"! Yes, loud and clear,...ALL night long.
 Let me go back to sum up my opinion of the why.
At 7weeks old she was admitted to Children's hospital and diagnosed with FTT/ Failure to thrive.
Basically, she wasn't gaining weight like they thought she should be and we needed to know why. So after 2 1/2 days in the hospital, 3 formula changes, stopping all nursing and breast milk, 3 doctors,a home nurse, and feeding more frequently we decided she was doing best on the Similac Advanced 22cal. every 2-3 hours around the clock. No skipping or sleeping through feedings. She HAD to gain weight and they wanted it fast.
Over the next 6 weeks I have been told to increase her volume by 1/2 oz each feeding once a week. Her original goal was 16-24oz/day. That meant she started at around 2 1/2-3 oz per feeding. She is now up to 4-4 1/2 oz every 3-4 hours. Here's where things get sketchy for me.
 She is suppose to get a minimum of 20oz/day now. They would like 24 oz average
4 1/2 oz x 6 feeding(every 4hours) = 27 oz And they wanted 8 feedings if possible or every 3 hours?!?! Which would be a total of 36oz!!!!!
So 27oz is 3oz more than what she is suppose to get in 24 hours.
Now from what I understand her stomach is only the size of an egg! So to me, an extra 3oz is a lot!
Which is why, IMO we were up and down...up and down...all night long with her screaming, flexing, flipping, scrunching up into a ball with a severe stomach ache.
Also, the formula has added iron! Which we all know pooping going on!
I am exhausted, frustrated.....
I'm seriously going to overdose on coffee!
Lord, Keep my motor runnin'! This momma is done!
3rd kid and I still have no clue!
Hope your Wednesday is brighter than mine!

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Today, Post #1

Today, new day? I'm starting over. Giving myself a much needed "redo". I love blogs, to write, to vent, to share.
I'm no longer just BUGNROOSMOM. Nope now I'm BUGNROOSMOM + BIRDIE or some such creative name I've yet to give myself.
I've been busy(having a baby and such). I've gotten lazy, went through a few "new to us" computers that I hate, and well honestly...I've gone into my self pity, this is going no where, blah blah moods and I made excuses.
Oh well, such is my life.
Today, I'm in a good place. I love my life, my family, my GIRLS, mostly my God, and well...I feel like writing today.
I still can't do all the cutesy, artistic things to make my blog one of the top ranking and I'll probably never make a dime from it, but today I'm okay with that.
So, it's just me, a crappy laptop that has a mind of it's own and a lot I want to get out. Well, and of course a pot of coffee that disappeared between 5am and now, 10am.
 I want This is the stuff... to be just that. The stuff that makes me, me. That makes me a woman, a mom, a wife, sister, friend. The stuff I live for, love, hate, discover or need to share. I am a completely random person and anything goes.
I have 3 beautiful daughters who are so completely different in so many ways, yet sometimes I'll catch a glimpse of some similarities.
My oldest, Bug. 15 years old. Struggling Sophomore...she is all teenager. The good, bad and ...well not ugly but you get it. She is both drama queen and athlete. Shy yet quick to anger. Strong yet extremely sensitive. She is exactly the 50/50 of her daddy and myself.
My middle child, Roo aka Tootsie Roo. She is 10 going on 21 some days, others she is 10 going back to 2. Yes, since the "newbie" arrived things have gotten challenging for her.
She is my tom boy. She loves sports, mud, rough housing. but she is also my artistic one. She loves to help cook, makes birthday cards for her friends and ALWAYS is coloring, gluing or cutting something. She hates change and is so far my most sensitive child. and THE best snuggle nuggler!
My youngest, my itty bitty Birdie. She was born at 37 weeks weighing 5lbs 1/2oz and 17inches long. Today, she is 13weeks/3 months and at last weight check was 8lbs. 4oz. She is feisty and already has her daddy's Italian temper. She is the blessing we all knew she would be and has proven over and over to me what Our God can give and do and show us! We have had struggles and he has helped us to overcome them and made us all stronger.
Glory be to God for ALL my blessings!

Keep watching for new posts.